Dude Dues

a pacifist's face and a snake's tongue

he was always ready for some action

slowpoke was smooth and sharp and fast

his name only served as a distraction

even if the whole world was crumbling

he was not ruffled or too concerned

the world is someone else's problem,

he said even when the planet burned

he went the distance but never too far

steady like a rock, cool as a cucumber

living for adventure came easy to him

and balance was his favourite number

for all his keeping his wits about him,

he was sometimes thoroughly reckless

like when he gave her a huge creampie

when all she wanted was a pearl necklace

the joke was on him, as he would find out

he didn't even have to get into matrimony

when the bun in the oven found its freedom

eternal child support was worse than alimony